


A Love So Bright

by sahiya



Series: The Bonds That Tie Us [2]
Category: White Collar
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Soul Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-18
Updated: 2013-09-18
Packaged: 2017-12-26 22:45:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/971178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sahiya/pseuds/sahiya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It started the day Neal broke into the Howser Clinic and made a mess of things. Afterwards, Elizabeth Burke dropped an anvil on his head and from then on Neal’s bond with Peter was inescapable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Love So Bright

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elrhiarhodan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elrhiarhodan/gifts).



> Thanks to Fuzzyboo for beta reading.

It started the day Neal broke into the Howser Clinic and made a mess of things. Afterwards, Elizabeth Burke dropped an anvil on his head and from then on Neal’s bond with Peter was always there in the back of his mind, humming away like a living thing. Undeniable. Inescapable. 

Bonds weren’t something you talked about, usually. There wasn’t any point. They were just there: part of the mental background noise. They could be broken, but most people didn’t want to break them. Neal supposed he wasn’t the first person to feel ambivalent about a bond, but that was his rational brain; the rest of him liked being bonded to Peter. Loved it, even. 

_Love_. That was the sticking point. You didn’t bond to people you didn’t love. For Neal to bond to Peter meant that he loved him. And for Peter to bond to Neal . . . 

It was all too much. 

Neal was pretty good at suppressing, and his bond with Kate was older and deeper than his bond with Peter. He shoved his bond with Peter way down where it couldn’t interfere with his search for Kate and focused on getting her back. By the time he found out what Operation Mentor really was, he’d succeeded well enough that the choice wasn’t really a choice. 

Until he saw Peter again. Until Peter came to the airfield and asked him to reconsider, and Neal felt the tug of their bond and suddenly felt all the _potential_ it contained. For a moment, he caught a glimpse of what Peter felt for him, what he’d be giving up if he and Kate just walked away, and it was enough - more than enough - to make him pause. A fatal hesitation, it turned out. 

Later, Neal couldn’t consciously recall much of the next few hours. Fire and smoke and the smell of burning fuel lived somewhere in his unconscious, but all he could really remember when he tried was the deadness of his bond with Kate and the aliveness of his bond with Peter. Peter held him on the airfield when Neal would’ve thrown himself into the fire, and Peter kept holding him through everything. He remembered the warmth of Peter’s arms around him and the warmth of the bond that pulsed with Peter’s heartbeat. 

Neal had rarely felt a bond so clearly before. The only experience he really had to compare it to was making love with Kate. He’d felt their bond then, felt the way it pulled and pushed between them. Up till now, his bond with Peter had been subtle and unobtrusive - he’d made sure of it. But that day on the airfield, his bond with Peter was anything but subtle. Peter’s love for him was so bright that Neal couldn’t believe no one else could see it. 

It scared the hell out of him. 

He was almost - _almost_ \- glad when they put him back in prison for a while after that. Neal didn’t trust himself not to do something undignified, like beg Peter to never leave him, or something stupid, like try to kiss Peter. He fantasized about doing both those things in the days after the explosion, when he wasn’t busy missing Kate’s bond like a missing limb. At least in prison he could be alone with his grief and had some hope of pulling himself together before he had to face Peter again on the outside. He hoped that by the time he got out again, the bond with Peter would have settled. 

And it did, sort of. It went back to being a low-level hum - ignorable, if stronger than it had been before. Neal relaxed. It’d been the extreme stress and emotion of the moment, he thought. Those sorts of experiences did tend to strengthen bonds. But that was all right. He could handle it. 

The afternoon he was released, Peter showed up to drive him back to the city. Neal came out to the car, just like he had that afternoon a few months earlier. Peter smiled at him and reached out, put his hand on Neal’s shoulder and squeezed. Just like that, the bond flared. Neal felt that smile, felt that touch, in his _soul_. It made his heart pound - with fear, with joy, with something that felt an awful lot like arousal.

“Oh my God,” he said aloud, because apparently the bond completely circumvented his brain-to-mouth filter. “We are in so much trouble.”

Peter looked, if anything, amused. “We need to get back to the office,” was all he said. “We have an active case. But El wants me to bring you home for dinner tonight. How does that sound?”

“Good,” Neal said. “Thanks.” There wasn’t much else he could say, after all. Getting far away from Peter Burke was starting to seem like a good idea to the rational part of him, but the rest of him thought that any minute he could spend in Peter’s presence had to be a good thing. 

It was a long day. By the time they made it back to Brooklyn, it was well after dark, and Neal was tired. He hadn’t slept very well in prison, and he was looking forward to his bed at June’s. But a homecooked meal sounded good, too, and he wanted to see Elizabeth. 

“Lasagna, hon?” Peter said when they walked in. Neal closed his eyes, just savoring the smell of the food cooking in the oven. Satchmo bumped against him and he opened his eyes, then reached down to pet the expectant dog. 

“Well, I thought it should be something I could reheat,” Elizabeth said, a teasing note in her voice. She kissed Peter and then hugged Neal. Neal closed his eyes again and rested his cheek on top of her head. She smelled even better than the lasagna. “Welcome home, sweetie,” she said, giving him one last hard squeeze before letting him go. “Should be ready in just a few minutes,” she added, and disappeared back into the kitchen.

Neal just stood there, too overwhelmed to move. After a moment, Peter came and put his arm around him. Neal couldn’t help himself; he leaned heavily into Peter, stopping just short of letting his head drop to rest on Peter’s shoulder. The bond was . . . resting, Neal supposed. Quiet, acquiescent. 

“You all right?” Peter asked. 

Neal didn’t even know how to answer him. “Do you feel it?” he asked at last. 

Peter nodded. Neal felt the movement against the side of his head. “Since the airfield.”

Neal was glad he didn’t have to look at him. “Does Elizabeth know?” Peter nodded again. Neal let out a shaky breath. “It doesn’t . . . it doesn’t scare you?”

“Scare me?” Peter said, pulling away to look at him. “No, Neal, it doesn’t scare me. Does it scare you?”

“Of course it scares me,” Neal said, finally meeting his eyes. “Bonds are powerful, Peter. Once I know someone’s bonds, I know exactly which buttons to push, how to get them to do what I need. And a bond like this, with you of all people - hell yes, I’m scared.”

Peter was quiet for a moment. “What do you mean, ‘with me of all people’?”

“You’re an FBI agent, Peter,” Neal said. “You hold my leash. A leash you know I’ll never slip now, because slipping it would hurt you, and I can’t do that.” Well, he _could_ \- the bond wouldn’t actually stop him - but he wouldn’t. 

Peter sighed. “It’s not the most convenient thing for me, either, you know. If you did do something - well, putting you back in prison would be the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”

“But you’d do it,” Neal said.

Peter met his eyes. “I don’t know.”

“ _Shit_ , Peter.”

“Plus, there’s the fact that I’m married and just as strongly bonded to El.” Peter shrugged and reached out, resting his hand on Neal’s shoulder. “Look, I’m not saying it’s always going to be easy. But it’s a _good_ thing, don’t you think?”

That was what El had said to him once. _The bond is a good thing._ Neal agreed, mostly. It had been nice to know that Kate loved him, that Moz loved him. And it was . . . well, it was good to know that Peter loved him, even if it frightened him. Maybe with time, he thought, it wouldn’t frighten him so much. 

Neal finally nodded. “Yeah. It’s a good thing.”

Peter pulled him in for a rough, one-armed hug. “I’m glad to have you back,” he said, into Neal’s hair. “Want to stay the night? It’s going to be late by the time we’re done eating.”

“On the couch?” Neal asked. 

“No, silly, in the guest room,” Elizabeth said. Neal looked up and saw her leaning in the doorway, a dish towel in her hands. He started to pull away from Peter, but Peter tightened his hold on him, keeping him there, tucked into his body. Elizabeth smiled. “For now, anyway.”

“Oh,” Neal said, and looked from Elizabeth to Peter and back again, assimilating the promise contained in those three words. “Yeah, thanks.”

“Good.” Elizabeth pushed off the doorjamb. “Come on, then. Dinner’s ready.”

_Fin._


End file.
